Little Moments That Became A Fic

Chapter 10: Joker's Terrible Gift

"Hey, Lexi~" Joker grinned up at him from where he was perched on the desk.

Lex paused in the doorway of his office. "What are you doing here, clown?" he sneered.

"Why, I just came ta congratulate ya on a successful crime!" Joker defended himself, putting a hand on his chest. His other hand was behind his back, holding something just out of view. This, of course, made Lex extremely wary.

"What are you blabbering about now?" Lex sighed, walking over to sit on his chair. Joker twisted in a slightly inhuman way to keep whatever he was holding out of Lex's sight. "I haven't done anything of note recently."

"Well, not recently, no," Joker agreed, "I'm talkin' about one of yer old crimes. Somethin' from before we really knew each other."

"I allegedly committed many crimes before we knew each other," Lex told him irritably, trying to see what he was hiding without making it seem like he was trying to do so, "why would one particular incident from years ago interest you?"

"Well, from what I know, no-one really told ya 'good job' fer dis one," Joker explained, "an' it just really seemed like somethin' dat deserves a pat on da back, at least."

"Great. Thank you. Get out," Lex deadpanned, knowing it was unlikely the other would listen to him but taking the chance anyways.

"Aw, but I haven't even given ya yer present yet!" Joker complained, pouting.

"If I accept this 'present', will you leave?" Lex asked.

"I'll be outta here quick as a Flash," Joker promised. Then, with a far too dark chuckle, he added in a low voice, "Trust me, I wouldn't be anywhere near here afterwards."

Very much not liking the sound of that but knowing from experience that the fastest way to get rid of Joker was to play along, Lex held out a hand. "Alright, give it to me," he sighed.

"Oh, oh!" Joker suddenly looked very excited, slapping his free hand against the desk in a rapid half-clap. "Ya actually said it! Nobody actually says it! Don't worry, I'm definitely gonna give it ta ya!"

With a cackle, he handed Lex a largish pink box and dashed out of the room as promised, though he couldn't actually go as fast as a Flash.

Not able to believe his luck that the Clown's excitement had caused him to leave before watching the box be opened, Lex went to call security to dispose of the thing with the rest of the hazardous materials.

All on its own, however, the box's lid popped open. Inside was a cake with a large number 40 on it. Lex groaned. He thought he had destroyed all evidence of that particular incident, but somehow Joker had found out. He was going to be the laughingstock of the underworld.

"How terrible," Lex joked, knowing no-one could hear him and figuring it might lift his mood.

"Passcode accepted," a mechanical voice said from the box, making Lex freeze. A stripe of blue light briefly lit up around the edges of the box, then went out... Taking every electronic device in the building, including the lights, with it.

"Joker!!!" he yelled.

"Secondary passcode accepted," the box announced, before spraying a green gas in his face.

It took Lexcorp months to recover from its headquarters spending an entire day without any power and having to replace anything even remote electronic, including many prototypes that were now utterly destroyed. None of this was helped by the fact that everyone was too busy uncontrollably laughing to get any work or repairs done.

And to think, it was all because Lex had once scoffed at Joker for saying he was good at predicting other people's behavior. Not even a nice laugh, no, just a dismissive little scoff. How terrible.