Smurfy Love

Chapter 7: Chapter 10: Planning Ahead

'Twas the day before Valentine's, and all throughout Blossom

Smurfs were making plans, both minor and awesome.

Blossom buzzed with pre-Valentine’s Day excitement. Decorations were going up, sweets were being made, and Smurfs whispered about potential dates for the big day. It seemed everysmurf had some sort of preparation or planning to do.

Inside his Mushroom, Flirty Smurf was making plans of his own, plans to have the best Valentine's ever. He stood tall in front of his mirror, straightening and restraightening his rose-colored scarf.

"Oh!" He sighed dramatically, smiling at his reflection. "Tomorrow, romance shall bloom! But who shall be the lucky Smurf to join me in a night of passion? Ah-ha-ha!" He chuckled to himself. Securing his scarf one last time, as it was his habit, he set out through his door and into the village to complete his most important holiday mission.

His first stop was Honey Smurf, who was carefully tending to her beehives.

"Honey, sweet as your namesake! Have you any plans for tomorrow, or shall we together harvest the nectar of love?" Flirty leaned against one of the hives, flashing her a dazzling and suggestive grin.

"I have plans." Honey didn’t even look at him, too busy bandaging a bee's leg. "I'm doing checkups on my colonies this week."

"A romantic stroll by moonlight would be far sweeter, no?" Flirty suggested. "You could bring your bees."

Honey turned to him, holding a bee up much too close to his face, making him back up with a yelp. "You sure about that? They tend to swarm around me when we're out."

Flirty considered this and gave a slight nod. "Point taken. Have a smurfy day, sweet one." He bowed, smirking at her eye roll, and left to try his luck again.

Next, he found Smurfette, arranging flowers in her window.

"Ah, the beauty of the village! The flower among weeds! The angel among—"

"No, Flirty," Smurfette said before he could finish.

"But I haven’t even asked yet!" He protested.

"You ask me out every year." She huffed, though there was no true anger in it, leaning against her window box. "And my answer is always the same. I don't know why you do this to yourself, Flirty."

"Oh, but my flower," he crooned, "this year I took your words to heart and asked somesmurf else first! But, alas, Honey was far too bzzzzy." He chuckled.

"Doing what, washing her hair?" Smurfette asked, making him scoff playfully. "Can you really blame her? I still remember last year when you recited poetry in the middle of the square."

Flirty gasped. "But my words were from the heart!"

"They were from Poet’s book, and you replaced ‘love’ with ‘Smurfette’ in every line."

"...Ah-ha-ha! A coincidence, surely!" Flirty insisted.

"Uh-huh. Yeah." Smurfette shook her head, turning back to her flowers. "I'm with Hefty now anyways, so you really can't keep smurfing me out, Flirty. I'm serious this time."

"Oh, alright." Flirty agreed with a shrug. He waved as he walked awat. "Tell him he's a lucky one, village flower."

Smurfette's giggles followed all the way to his next destination; Handy's shop. He stood in the doorway, eyes bright amd smile charming.

"My dear Handy, I find myself in need of some special help for tomorrow." Flirty wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "It seems my heart has broken right in two, and I was hoping you could–"

"Please tell me you aren't smurfing me out." Handy groaned, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Astute as always, my talented friend!" Flirty snapped his fingers, looking pleased. "So what say you? A dinner, candlelight, perhaps a—"

"I'm working on twenty orders for tomorrow." Handy interrupted. "Besides, in case you forgot, I hate you."

Flirty put a hand to his chest. "Whatever did I do?"

Handy raised an eyebrow. "Seriously? You broke into my shop to make out with a sprite three times–"

"She was leaving soon, we wanted to savor our time together!"

"–convinced half the town my lipstick machine was a kissing machine–"

"I thought it was!"

"–and, oh yeah, won't stop flirting with me." Handy frowned. He pointed his mallet at Flirty. "You're a nice enough Smurf when you're not being a pushy ass, Flirty, but I don't like you that way. Never have. Never will. Now get out."

With a theatrical sigh, Flirty departed as ordered, making a mental note to cross Handy out for next year. Ah, alas, he and Smurfette were always the most fun. But was he to do, when they'd made themselves so very clear?

Flirty made his way to the training grounds, where Hefty Smurf was lifting weights.

Flirty strutted up. "Ah, strength! Power! The muscles of a champion! And yet, what is strength without love?"

Hefty set down his weight and arched a brow. "What do you want, Flirty?" He asked in that fondly exasperated, almost patronizing tone he so often used with Blossom's more ridiculous residents.

"A simple proposition! A romantic outing for the most dashing and strong Smurfs in the village."

Hefty snorted. "You do remember I'm with Smurfette, right?"

"She could always come along." Flirty suggested — looking back, this was perhaps his least wise decision of the day. He beat a hasty retreat, ducking to avoid a thrown dumbbell. "Perhaps another time..."

Back in the safety of the main village, he spotted Pilot Smurf, who was brushing the wings of one of his birds.

"Pilot, beauty of the sky!" Flirty purred, getting just a bit too close to the other Smurf. "Ever considered soaring into the skies of romance?"

Pilot put a single finger on his chest, lightly pushing him away. "Hello, Flirty. Sorry, but I've got some new birds to train, I don't have time for a date."

"Why not do both? Imagine — us, beneath the stars, the wind in our hats, my arms wrapped around you." He chuckled, dropping his voice to a suggestive whisper. "I can think of a few things I've never done on birdback before~"

"Absolutely not." Pilot said flatly.

Flirty pouted. Then he caught sight of Nosey, and went on to ask out the next Smurf on his list. And the next. And the next, next, next...

The day of hearts, day of love, 'twas finally here!

But one Smurf was alone, with none to hold near...

Blossom was alive with festivities, but one Mushroom remained dark, curtains drawn forlornly over the windows. Outside, a few Smurfs passed by, whispering.

"Poor Flirty. Got turned down by everysmurf." One said. "Maybe we should try to cheer him up?"

"Nah." Another shook their head. "Leave him be, we don't wanna make him feel any more humiliated than he already is."

With that decided, the Smurfs of Blossom avoided the rejected Smurf's house, leaving him alone so as not to remind him that he was alone. That's Smurf logic for ya.

Behind the locked door of his Mushroom, Flirty Smurf sat in an armchair front of his fireplace, wrapped in a blanket. A steaming mug of tea sat beside him, untouched, as he cracked open the latest novel in his favorite romance series.

"Ahhh, peace at last." He murmured, letting out a contented sigh.

The fire crackled, the world outside melted away, and Flirty Smurf — free from obligation — enjoyed the best night of all: one spent in perfect solitude with a good book.

His mission had been a complete success.